High Stress Job?

Let's explore the nature of stress and its relationship to our circumstances. Are there inherently stressful situations? This question is worth examining, considering how many of us believe we must change our circumstances to find relief.

When we think of the death of a loved one, a terminal illness, or the plight of families living in war-torn regions, stress seems inevitable. Surely, it must stem from the harsh reality of these circumstances, right?

Or could it be that our emotions arise from something other than our circumstances?

Is it possible that even within painful events, peace, love, and calm are attainable?

To answer these questions, I turned to a familiar context: high-pressure, high-stress work environments.

The Nature of Stress

Universality of Stress

If stress originates from circumstances, we'd expect all people in a given situation to experience it as stressful. However, this isn't the case. While many describe their workdays as overloaded, the experience of stress is more personal.

Consistency of Stress

If stress were event-dependent, one's experience should remain constant as long as the circumstances do. Yet, we know that people can grow their capacity to handle 'stressful' situations. Many individuals have completely transformed their ability to manage challenging circumstances, even when those circumstances remain unchanged.

Fluctuation of Stress

If stress came from circumstances, we'd expect people's experiences to be constant in a stressful environment. However, even individuals who describe their work environments as painfully stressful admit to moments of calm. One client described it as "forgetting to be stressed."

The Internal Nature of Stress

These observations suggest that stress may not originate from circumstances but from within us. This realization leads to an important question:

Is it my fault that I feel stressed, and should I always feel happy?

The answer is no. Here's why:

We don't control our thoughts, conditioning, or habits. These elements move through us but are not us. Have you ever had a thought that you recognize as one of your parents'? It can be unsettling until we realize it's not our thought, but simply conditioned into us.

This doesn't mean we're victims of our thoughts, conditioning, or emotions. When we notice a thought or emotion we don't like, we can allow it to pass through without giving it additional weight.

A New Perspective on Stress

Stress is not inherently negative; it's a valuable signal. Just as physical pain alerts us to move our hand from a hot surface, stress signals that we've innocently misused the gift of thought.

It's guiding us to let go of unhelpful thinking and reconnect with the present moment. Stress is part of our inner guidance system, like rumble strips on roads alerting us when we've veered out of our lane.

The Neutrality of Circumstances

Are there inherently stressful circumstances? From this perspective, no. Circumstances are neutral by nature. Only we can create stress.

This is good news because it lets us know when we're lost in our minds rather than engaged in the life unfolding before us. When dealing with real-life challenges, stress is rarely helpful. A quiet mind is where solutions to real-life problems often emerge.

So, the next time you feel stressed, consider accepting the invitation to a quiet mind. You might realize that what you thought was a problem is no problem at all. Or you might find that a quiet mind is fertile ground for peace, love, and clarity on what to do next.